12:29 p.m. - Monday, Nov. 02, 2009
Heavy Load
I have come down with a chronic case of procrastination. This morning, I rolled out of bed at 7:30am . . .after an hour of hitting the snooze button on the alarm, wondering whether it was worth it to skip class today. Finally I got up and brushed my teeth, not bothering to put in my contacts or take a shower . . .I pulled on the same stinky clothes I wore yesterday and barely made it to class on time.
And here I am again, a few hours later, having just showered . . .still wondering whether it would be worth it to skip my second class of the day. Knowing that I haven't prepared. Knowing that a performance which I don't want to do is looming ahead of me. And juries I haven't memorized music for. And a paper I haven't started to write. And a house that needs to be cleaned.
But I'm showing up. I'm showing up again and again and again. And as much as I feel down and dejected and sad and tired today - this is still a victory.
Today, the resistance is so heavy. But I'm still pushing.
�
�
